Monday, November 12, 2012

Ode to the S. S. Arizona...

by klr

Berthed in deep rolling blue waves
concave wooden throat                                                    
built by men who armored her
over steel petticoat
where shellfish dote
hundreds sleeping in her nave

Telescope facing westward
night turned to mellow
Hawaiian dawn's dew in morn    
newborn sun to follow
dire whistles blow                                                               
evident world wide war spurred

Best Navy in entire world
foiled communique`
scores of lives immortalized
that sky's December day
harbor soiree
thunderous Heavens unfurled

Written for Sunday's mini challenge over at imaginary garden with real 
toads...this form of poetry in stanzas of 6 lines with rhyme; I used the subject 
of war, peace, armistice in accordance with Veterans Day.

the imaginary garden with real toads


  1. many intriguing words choices here, especially (for me) "newborn sun to follow." yes, the sun still rises. very nice verses and subtle use of the form.

  2. You have done an excellent job, both with the stanza form and in the focus on your subject. I thought the rhyming words were excellent - subtle and adding musicality to the piece.

  3. Agree with Kerry--you've built on each stanza here, and the individual rhymes are very effective. I especially like 'harbor soiree.'

  4. You've filled this form to full with your subject...well done...I also enjoy...

    "Hawaiian dawn's dew in morn
    newborn sun to follow"

    Great work!

  5. You have described it perfectly ... well illustrated !!!

  6. you have done a beautiful job with the challenge. I love your verses and it's a splendid tribute too. happy week to you kkkkaty.

  7. we just watched video of this in history class yesterday...of pearl capture it well in verse as well...


All comments, constructive and otherwise, are welcome and appreciated here. Thank you to those who show an interest in my quirky style of writing, photography, painting, and presenting a feeling or thought and for stopping by A Dwelling by the Sea..