Thursday, April 25, 2013

Three Sijo..Poetry Form from Asia..

Sijo is composed in three lines, each line having 14-16 syllables, 
for a total count of between 44-46 syllables for the entire poem out of Asia.  
Samuel Peralta over at dversepoets.com  is instructing us to write one, or two.  

A Sailor's Dilemma 



Unable  to  hide  love or  smoke,  he  sails  in  the  morning  to  drift

 into  the  colorless sea  life  pressed  within  time's  dusty  pages -

between  old  and  new,  to decide if  he  still  feels  the  same for her

~~~~


 A Pioneer's Tale


Lewis & Clark at mouth of Columbia River


Fearlessly guarded in her Bible, between books Matthew and John

since 1853, for spirited native hearts unbroken   

a four leaf clover still wafer thin, picked from a burnished meadow

~~~


A Pink Moon




Gathering at cusp of twilight, they honked under their breaths, gaggling

A pink rouge of sun set behind the mountains, their destination

 little effort ascending to greet their domain, dark silhouettes


49 comments:

  1. wonderfully done. you first, my fave. of the three, holds the age old question (between love n smoke) i enjoy these images. I esp. love the burnished meadow in your second and your third is beautifully painted with rouge and silhouettes.

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    1. Thank you...I guess I passed the test ;)

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  2. what a wonderful journey in that first one...to see if he feels the same...gives it nice emotion. last line in the second is killer as well...you did really well with this form...

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  3. Beautiful...I particularly love the last one, very visual!

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  4. These are all good and varied.Sijo colour suits you. You should wear it more often:)

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  5. You are very productive Katy with 3 sijo poems ~ Your first is my favorite of the 3 ~

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    1. ..it seems to be the most commented on ..thanks, Grace.

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  6. I like each of yours, Katy. I agree with Grace, and your first is my favorite too. I hope he is able to reach his decision.

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  7. As an ex recreational sailor, the first one drew me in. I am battling within myself to decide if his love of her is the boat or a woman, or maybe just a love of the sea.

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    1. Could be any or all of the three ;)

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  8. Beautifully crafted Katy! My fav is the last one with all its added mystery! Great!

    Hank

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  9. Drawn in immediately with each of your sijo. I like how you were confident enough to test yourself in three separate poems, and how you gave thought to the thematic implications.

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  10. Wow, Three that are very unique I don't think I can decide which I like more as they all have a tale within the lines. Each full of mystery.

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  11. i like them all but the first one really moved me..gorgeous images and very emotionally touching

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  12. I must agree with sentiments above, the first one is a shining star. I like the pink moon also with its imagery.

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  13. These are all fantastic, though the clover touched me the most.

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    1. interesting...it's a true story..my g,g,g grandmother crossed the plains and wrote a diary ..another story.

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  14. Wow this is exquisite I might try this form, though I could never write anything as beautiful as this

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  15. ...deeply contemplative finding hypothesis on the first one Katy... an affirmation of consistency in this world where everything changes... great write... thanks for sharing... smiles...

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    1. hm..consistency..yes, there is a thread of it..

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  16. A lovely triplet... I especially like the third one, a pink rouge of sun.

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  17. Katy,

    Three such different subjects, but all beautiful...Thinly veiled is a common thread - all are on a journey.

    Aren't we all...

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  18. Love the feeling of the first one...seeking clarity in the expansiveness and solitude of the open sea.

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    1. glad you like it ..I love the sea, too.

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  19. Three . . . and so well done. I'm not sure I could pick a favorite. Nope, not gonna. Thank you for your recent visit and kind words.

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  21. loved how we became intimate with the subject and yet had a view of the surroundings

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  22. I like them all very much, particularly the first.

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  23. I like this form, your sijo are such good stories, vivid, moving.

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  24. They are all interesting and well done - great images - the clover, the geese - and language - - thanks! k.

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  25. I think you did a wonderful job with all of these. The topics are beautifully described...the feelings and images strong in each one. The second one particularly touched me... However, I did have a hard time reading them through the background image.
    Gayle ~

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    1. oh dear, I thought I had fixed that with bolder larger fonts...will change the background probably fairly soon..thanks for the nice comment.

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  26. I love time's dusty pages, and the last one simply went straight to my heart. Have you read "Lessons from the Geese"? a wonderful source of wisdom.You'll find it at http://med.fsu.edu/uploads/files/FacultyDevelopment_LessonsGeese.pdf

    I have it on my office wall, to remind me how interdependent we are.

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    1. So glad you mentioned the dusty pages..i will read the 'lesson from the geese' ..thanks :)

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  27. Loved the imagery of all the three and the verses were so very profound in tht backdrop...loved thepioneer the most for thr breathless wonder it created

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    1. ..each sijo were chosen as favorites...thanks so much...

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  28. Colorless sea? -- I always viewed it as colorful -- albeit monotone at times. The question of feeling the same to a sea that may have once been colorful to him is interesting.

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  29. ..the color of water depends on what's being reflected...

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All comments, constructive and otherwise, are welcome and appreciated here. Thank you to those who show an interest in my quirky style of writing, photography, painting, and presenting a feeling or thought and for stopping by A Dwelling by the Sea..