Thursday, July 31, 2014

Traveling with doves..












At  dversepoets.comdVerse today Brian ask us to use the form Paradells -
this is described thusly:
The paradelle is a 4-stanza poem, where each stanza consists of 6 lines.
For the first 3 stanzas, the 1st and 2nd lines should be the same; the 3rd and 4th lines should also be the same; and the 5th and 6th lines should be composed of all the words from the 1st and 3rd lines and only the words from the 1st and 3rd lines.
The final stanza should be composed of all the words in the 5th and 6th lines of the first three stanzas and only the words from the 5th and 6th lines of the first three stanzas.:  



Traveling with white doves from dawn till dusk 
  - traveling with white doves from dawn till dusk
my sail seeks your sweet kiss on a slight breeze 
My sail  seeks your sweet kiss on a slight breeze
A soft breeze carries my kiss traveling
from dusk till dawn, white doves carry your kiss

Faintly I hear your tender whisper call
 - faintly I hear your tender whisper call
I'm gliding due west searching for my bliss
I'm gliding due west searching for my bliss
Due west,  tenderly gliding, your whisper call
faintly I hear, my bliss due west ..searching


Falling stars spell your name in midnight blue
- falling stars spell your name in midnight blue
I feel your presence with the morning dew
-  I feel your presence with the morning dew
Your name I spell in the falling morn dew
Midnight blue feels your presence in the stars  


Searching in the midnight blue for your kiss
 I feel your spell falling with soft white doves
Due west, a slight breeze carries your presence
blissfully gliding my sails from dawn till dusk
With the soft morning dew I hear your call
I hear your name whispered by the stars





19 comments:

  1. This was a sweet rendering of the love poem.. I love the last stanza.. You got it so well together

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  2. oh some cool magic touches...the falling stars spelling the name in the heavens is cool...and you spelling it in the morning dew...think are my favs....i like the 5/6 lines in the opening as well...the kiss sailing on to them...and nice job on the last stanza too, not a awkward word placement at all...very cool kathy

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  3. This was so coherent...did you write the last stanza first? A great love poem!!

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  4. Such a romantic; makes me wish my wife was not out of town. You rocked the form, & gave it a Lord Byron twist; very nicely done, K. I like the line /your name I spell in the falling morning dew/.

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  5. This is a very romantic take on the prompt, Katy! "Falling stars spell your name in midnight blue" - my favorite line in your poem along with the closing line.

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  6. This is incredibly beautiful, with the doves, the midnight blue and the loved one's presence on the morning dew.......

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  7. This is a beautiful and gentle and dreamlike poem, Kathy. You worked the form very well.

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  8. this was so elegant... it was more like a gentle echo... lovely

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  9. The poem has a soft lilting effect and moves gracefully breathing peace...beautifully spun...

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  10. Very romantic, and you managed this form beautifully.

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  11. Lovely poem Katy, so well done.

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  12. Romantic and poignant - lovely response to the prompt.

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  13. traveling with white doves from dawn till dusk... how awesome would that be...love the tender voice in this katy...

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  14. I am so in love with this poem - beautifully done - K

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  15. Amazing. You wrote something beautiful in spite of the absurd restrictions. You're a master.

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  16. Wonderful offering Katy! A smooth venturing out with love as a support! Great write!

    Hank

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  17. wow! wonderfully crafted. each stanza is lovely, but there is something about the first I particularly liked.

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  18. I am sorry, Kathy, but doves and morning dew have no place at the sea. One wonders if you are serious, or if you are just making fun of the art of poetry.

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All comments, constructive and otherwise, are welcome and appreciated here. Thank you to those who show an interest in my quirky style of writing, photography, painting, and presenting a feeling or thought and for stopping by A Dwelling by the Sea..