Tuesday, September 15, 2015
A wisp of hair..
This is under 200 words...my first thought when it came to the subject of "CHANGE', the prompt given to write about today over at dversepoets.com My, the possibilities are endless
Incredibly soft skin, a wisp of hair
a knowing look -
wrapped in a blanket
Soft early yellow light gently fills the room
By mid morning the dew is gone;
a rusty bicycle slouches against a willow tree;
each day refreshed
By noon, citrine beams push up
a beanstalk reaching above a wall;
the playground explored,
lessons hammered in,
knowledge ricochets beyond the local fray,
Ideas are jettisoned across bridges of dreams,
to be spent or realized
Over time, joys and sorrows careen
in the blazing late afternoon sun
Much is given, much taken away
Passion and pride intact.
there is much to do, one lifetime
to dance in the streets;
doors to the Library of Memories
are kept open late
Welcome evening shade slips
between streams of amber light,
bent upon a good heart
Moonlight trickles into eyes
incredibly deep, with wrinkled stories,
grey shades of light, veins of life
Peaceful rest, wrapped in a blanket,
a knowing look,
incredibly soft skin,
.....a wisp of hair
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Careening is a great word, because I feel the pace in this as being so very fast - which is what life is. Nice wrap around from the opening line to the repetition of it in the end as well. I like the details like the rusty bicycle - which to me is another indicator of life passing us by.
ReplyDeleteThank you...I didn't know where I was going when I started, but 'careen' was on my mind so I had to use it.
DeleteThis is just a jewel of a poem. The beginning and ending tying together, the sense of life careening (wonderful word) These lines speak deeply to me: Moonlight trickles into eyes
ReplyDeleteincredibly deep, with wrinkled stories,
grey shades of light
From first open eyed look at the world to the wrinkled tales....just a wonderful poem.
Thank you, Toni. I am touched you are touched.
DeleteI like this from start to end.. like all the generations come and go.. the little wisp of hair.. Also some beautiful gentle images of rusty bicycle and the garden... so much to love in this poem where I see a lot of cycle of life.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you liked it, Bjorn. That wisp of hair was my starting point.
DeleteA memory-soaked day in your life, as the past descends onto your brow like prickly heat, like over spray from the water bottle while ironing linens; lovely & lyrical. You never fail to score, to rock the pub, to give insights sprinkled with humor & wisdom. I like the lines/doors to the Library of Memories/are kept one late/.
ReplyDeleteThanks Glenn....I appreciate your generous words of praise....gee, I guess I can write, sometimes better than others, of course.
DeleteI specially love this part:
ReplyDeletethere is much to do, one lifetime
to dance in the streets;
doors to the Library of Memories
are kept open late
And I like how you tied it back again to peaceful rest, wisp of hair ~
Your poem is as rich with detail a it is with meaning! A lovely write.
ReplyDeleteWonderful write. Gem of a poem :D
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteSorry to digress
ReplyDeleteand change
within but
this reminds
me of when my
mother stories
tale telling
father there's
something about
my boy's eYes..
he knows too much
and my father's response..
you will come here one night..
and he will have his legs propped
up.. smoking one of my cigarettes..
i never
smoked..
smiles..
change
is best..
YES..
ENDLESS
POSSIBILITIES..
TO JUST DO IT..;)
Change for the good is good medicine. Natural changes are not to be feared. It's the unwanted, unwarranted changes and needless and cruel changes we don't like and fear.
DeleteWe seem to leave as we come in to this world, wrapped in cloth and whisped with hair. The aesthetic of your words are warm and 'craddling,' almost motherly to me. The tinge of ugliness, the rust of a bicycle and hammering of lessons, adds a realism which keeps this poem from being too nostalgic or "clean," in my opinion. Your words are very pleasant to read.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much...I feel the same about your writing.
DeleteI so enjoyed this...so beautifully described! It begins with a babe wrapped in a blanket and ends with the aged, much like babies, wrapped in blankets, soft skin and wisps of hair. So much happens in between...good thing the "library of memories" is open late.
ReplyDeleteGayle ~
Very nice take on the prompt, a wonderful weaving of the changing day with the changes of life. My favorite lines are: "Ideas are jettisoned across bridges of dreams, / to be spent or realized." Not every idea amounts to something, but they ride our dreams to their destination. Peace, Linda
ReplyDeleteWelcome evening shade slips
ReplyDeletebetween streams of amber light,
bent upon a good heart
How the day develops from the morning, noon and night cleverly narrated Kathy! The evening readily welcomes that great ending to a wonderful day!
Hank