My first attempt at a cinquain, trying it out over at imaginerygardenwithtoads where there are frequent interesting challenges...the form is catchy, not sure I've got it , but fun trying...
Strict syllable count: 2-4-6-8-2
Strong title (important with such a tight poem)
Strong imagery (perhaps, even, an image per line)
Nature imagery, as in haiku or tanka (though I certainly vary from this!)
Juxtaposition or a clever “turn” at the end
SPRINGTIME
Snow drops
peer from under
sleepy lids with blankets,
tucked in by rich warm soil,
tucked in by rich warm soil,
webbed feet skitter across the stage
first act
Gladly
awakening,
cast arrives in order
of appearance in dressing room
Hostas
Garden
colors rotate,
performing now through fall,
playing rolls with no rehearsal
rain shine
Front row
theater seats
from snow drops' wide peephole;
best place to watch the finale
Applause
This chain of cinquains is absolutely gorgeous. I love the flower/theatre metaphor.
ReplyDeleteThank you..I could have gone on and on..
DeleteI love the way you worked on the prompt ... lovely !!!
ReplyDeletei love this! bravo! what a lovely tour of seasons and blossoms, and if this describes your garden, i would like to visit. i like how your first verse ends with "first act" and sets us up to imagine where the rest is going. also, these amplify something i like about this strict form--that using longer-syllable words instead of many shorter words makes the poems actually look different. it's cool, and in yours, that differences makes the whole thing *look* interesting, appropriate as your garden is no doubt beautiful to look at. they're like four blossoms from four different plants, blossoming at different times, each according to its own whim. wonderful!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the prompt, Marian..one more and it would have made a garland, right?
DeleteI love the spring performance of these blooms, applause for the form and flowing words ~
ReplyDeleteNo rehearsal is needed for these beauties ~
..thank you..it was fun..
DeleteI cannot wait to begin seeing these here, but I think it will be awhile.
ReplyDeleteSuch a wonderful photograph.
Thanks, photo from internet images ;_)
Deletebeautifully conducted:-)
ReplyDeleteA very oriental feel to this in some ways, but also has the western excitement of performance--makes for a very effective combination, and a lovely series of garden vignettes as well.
ReplyDeleteMuch appreciated, Hedge, thanks...
DeleteYou managed your first cinquain beautifully!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you..
Delete....thank you...
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful. With a daughter who has a master's in theater this one really reaches me in your choice of describing the changing season.
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI love the view through your aperture! I practically grew up in a theater and I love your cinematic debut ;D
ReplyDeleteWell Done :D
this is so beautiful!
ReplyDeletethis is so beautiful!
ReplyDeleteWow. This, the second mention of snowdrops... hmmm..
ReplyDeleteA virtual cascade of beauty. The order, each bloom with its own unique delightful qualities... and ending with applause, very clever, a nature theme.
You hit ALL the right qualities that were mentioned in the prompt. Kudos. Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.com/2013/02/04/cinquains-for-real-toads/
nice...esp. love the playing rolls with no rehearsal...aren't those the best shows...? smiles
ReplyDeletesmiles...its all natural in those moments and i think that makes it all the more special...i rather like the snow as well...
ReplyDeletePerfect variety show, one for refined practitioners of their arts or a fantasia--no chintzy in between.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. I woke to the sound of rain this morning and the spring bulbs in my planting beds are pushing through the soil. I am ready for this :)
ReplyDeleteStunning imagery here. Lovely writing.
ReplyDelete